Standard Apple fanboy’s response to Windows dickhead’s question

As I was packing up my iBook after a presentation yesterday, a colleague sidled over and ask me the question. “Why a Mac?”

I smiled and geared up for the answer. “It’s just so easy!” I replied all smug and grinning from ear to ear. His reply threw me off and stopped the big lecture, that I was then formulating in my head, dead in its tracks.

“Thats what all Mac users say. Its so cliche,” he said with a smile.

That got me thinking. Is that all we have as argument against a Windows-centric universe? Below is a list of tired and overused explanations that any Apple fanboy can recite in his dreams. Well some Apple fanboys…

1. Its so easy

2. There are no/few viruses/spyware

3. Even my 80-year old grandma can use it

grandma_computer.jpg

4. Its so predde even when it crashes

5. Steve Jobs is God. So he knows best (usually said while prostrating on the floor)

6. Bill Gates is evil. How can you pay the Devil? (usually said while making the sign of the cross)

7. Windows is soooo primitive

8. Have you seen the mess of cables and wires behind your windows PC lately?

9. The “Get-A-Mac” ads are true. Believe or die!

10. The Mac guy in the ads is way cooler looking

dress_mac_01.jpg

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3 comments on “Standard Apple fanboy’s response to Windows dickhead’s question

  1. For me, mac is a nice machine to use, but not a productive machine for my daily life. Maybe because I am very used to Windows already.

    Virus? If you know how to use a computer, you should know how to install a antivirus software. There are many free antivirus software out there.

    Hang? My macbook has hang on me quite a few times, while I can’t remember when is the last time my Windows XP hanged.

    Price? I am get a much more powerful windows based PC with the amount money I spent on a simple imac. When I wanna upgrade later, I can still reuse the monitor that I paid for my windows, while mac is all in one and all gone in one.

    … 😛

  2. i switched 6 months ago after 10 years of windows. i take your point about antivirus and how a tech savvy person should be able to protect himself or herself against any virus. i don’t remember any major disasters with windows as far as viruses are concerned to be honest.

    with the mac its less one headache and the system is so much more elegant. i am a sucker for these kind of things. thats just me.

  3. There’s nothing ‘elegant’ about the system at all. It’s 100% the same. Give or take the huge GUI bug that maximized screens don’t max in Apples, heh, and the file management tools in Win == Apple except the annoying cramped style of Apple’s choice dating from 7.x and 8.x where rows are not maximized for readability, and abstractions meant to simplify partitions and media are simply icons which seems great like the the finder but really are just eyesores after 1st grade in computing. Basically the GUI of anything Apple is just a widget, and that is available on any platform. Nothing is unique about the Apple GUI nor its HFS+ file system, nor journaling.

    Most of what makes apple more appealing is its advertising and ego appeal. it rarely when broken down has a single thing to do with reality, its all vaporware. and virii? well maybe people should stop spending 85% of their time downloading porn that needs new ‘video plugins’ to run, and playing with stolen software. Virii are like the bricks people put in boxes of new products and sell on the street, buyer beware and Apple has a ton of hidden installables you just have no clue about.

    The ultimate douchebaggery is to also claim apple has superior ‘graphics’ as we all know who understand this weaving of misinformation technically it is untrue, and subjectively it is weighted again, but popular polling of what is hip, which is nothing to claim on a masked argument of non subjective analytical claims.

    I use anything available that doesn’t force me to interact with it like its an ATM machine and slows me to a drool speed. I also choose not to backhandedly purchase hardware that forces me to comply to marketing scams and hidden proprietary hardware because of greed, and that goes for HP and old Dell computers as well.

    For the average user, most people, Americans the knot of it, are completely mad about Apple because they want something to the effect of the emporer’s new clothing. No single argument has ever landed anything but “well I’m completely full of shit and I want to feel cool, so I will just whip up the easiest and flimsiest excuse for purchasing this”.

    My friend Walter has a problem, he always needs to have the best of everything in his eyes, which boils down to the most expensive and ployishly best. If he hears some cell phone might have a better vibration mode, heh, he needs it. IF he finds out that there are new tweaks on another LCD or Plasma (shudders) he needs it. He cannot live without spending his money because he fears being out of the loop in a social setting with technology, and everything really.

    My argument is this, Apple exists solely to appeal to the BMW lover inside us all, but like religion mixes fact with brain washing fiction. Apple doesn’t have power steering, it’s components are all PC parts, and have been since Wozniack’s garage. The software does not have an amazing appeal, its interface has nothing revolutionary, and anyone who knows computing in depth knows it is all related. There is no argument besides:

    1. I LIKE IT SO THERE!
    2. IF I HAVE THIS PEOPLE WILL THINK IM COOL (sad)

    that’s about it. and that does NOT endorse pcs, it simply states there are no medals, this is not the olympics, and the systems no matter how much you try to bend the truth are exactly the same.

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